I have recently been talking to a girlfriend who just had a baby about parenthood, expectations, and reality. As we have had multiple conversations on different topics, I realized that people in general stray away from talking about the hardships with a new baby. I remember when I was pregnant with our first son, I would think to myself that our child would be different from what people “warned” me about or tried to give advice on. For some reason, I told myself our baby would be the exception. Spoiler…he was not.
I think it is so important to have those honest conversations with others going through it, especially the first time around. My husband and I are very open with parenting topics, however will never give unwarranted advice or opinions on things. I truly believe that people want to figure things out on their own and each experience or situation is completely different and unique. We are an open book to those who ask, however understand that people have to go through it to truly understand it. Parenting is a funny thing because until you are in the thick of it, you don’t fully understand what it entails.
Those first few weeks or months with a baby can feel isolating, draining, and simply overwhelming. I thought I would share some things that have helped me and hopefully encourage others! I would love to know anything that helped you.
- Reach out to people (professional or personal). Simply talking about it can help so much.
- Ask for help, especially if your mental health is being compromised.
- We all deal with stress differently. Communicate with your partner what you are feeling or needing.
- Remember you are not alone, even though middle of the night feels completely isolating.
- People only share the good moments.
- Your life changed completely overnight. It will take time to adjust.
- Even though it doesn’t seem like it at times, you will get over the hump.
- Nothing is a one size fits all…what works for one person may not work for you.
- You are learning and figuring out your baby, just as they are learning about you and the world.
- You are in a transitional season.
- Your experience is your own.
- Find someone who can be an anchor to you and keep you grounded.
And of course, once you are on the other side…be a light to someone else.
As always, sending light and love.